The Showcase of the Immortals… Featuring Tons of Funk

Tons of Funk

It was made official minutes ago that the tenth match on the WrestleMania card would be an 8-man tag pitting Brodus Clay, Tensai and the Funkadactyls against Team Rhodes Scholars and The Bella Twins.

That does not sound right, does it?

When it comes to The Show of Shows, it is WWE’s duty to not only showcase the big names, such as The Rock or CM Punk, but also introduce some of the lesser known ones. That used to be one of the main goals of the annual Money in the Bank match, before it was given its own theme Pay-Per-View. I appreciate the fact that the company is exploring other ways to feature mid-card talent on The Grandest Stage of Them All, but this contest simply cannot be taken seriously.

I am not against Cody Rhodes and Damien Sandow having a spot on the WrestleMania card, on the contrary, I think they have more than earned that right. Nevertheless, the program they have been thrown into is nothing short of a disgrace to their talent and their potential to one day main-event WWE Pay-Per-Views. Team Rhodes Scholars is a prime example of inconsistent booking. They were paired together, pushed as a top tag team, they were split so that Sandow could be elevated as a singles competitor, and now they are back together, because creative has nothing else for these two during WrestleMania season, when part-timers have occupied the top of the card.

And then we get to the team Rhodes and Sandow have been feuding with. The only reason for the existence of the Brodus Clay-Tensai tag team, or as WWE has been referring to it, Tons of Funk, is Sweet T’s failure to get over as a monster heel. The natural thing to do was have him hang out with a guy whose gimmick has been getting stale over the last year. I do not want to take anything away from George Murdoch and Matt Bloom as performers, but I find it mind-boggling that someone backstage decided they should be featured in the biggest show of the year.

My displeasure with this match has to do with the fact that Brodus Clay’s cameo at WrestleMania 28 was mildly entertaining simply because the Funkasaurus gimmick had only recently made its debut. It also has to do with the fact that WWE has done its best to kill all of Tensai’s credibility in the last few months. I am against this match taking place at the grand event, because The Bella Twins’ involvement with Team Rhodes Scholars does not make much sense either. I also despise the fact that any screen time this match is given would mean less time for the matches we truly care about.

More importantly, it has to do with the fact that while Clay and Tensai are now set to do their awkward, unfunny dance moves at WrestleMania, credible competitors such as Antonio Cesaro and Kofi Kingston have been left out of the card.

Let that sink in. WWE would rather showcase two comedy acts in the form of dancing superheavyweights than Cesaro’s impressive ring work.